My in-laws refuse to babysit my son (7), unless my daughter (4) is with him. But they are more than willing to drive for miles to babysit just my daughter. They have no interest in being with him, but they coo all over my daughter. He is older and can see all this. What makes it worse is that my son senses all this and tries even harder to get their attention, which bugs them more. He makes drawings and sings songs and then he starts to get a little annoying, but I can understand why. Sometimes he takes it out on his little sister and then he really gets himself into trouble even though I know why he’s done it. I have no idea what to do about this. My husband tried to tell them they need to spend time with him alone, but they just can’t bring themselves to do it. I think we should not let them see either kid unless they can be fair. Or will I make it worse?
Carrie, Michigan
2 responses so far ↓
Manipulated in Miami // February 16, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Well, this one strikes close to home – - too close, actually . We have the same situation with our daughters. You’d think someone, anyone with kids, or who has raised kids, would know better than to pit siblings against each other, but I guess some grown ups really are sick in the head.
Meg M., Austin // February 18, 2009 at 2:08 am
I can totally relate – it is so frustrating!! My son was the apple of his grandparents’ eyes and received much doting affection….until his sister was born. Now he does the same thing, pushing for attention until he ends up irritating everyone. I tried to talk to my in-laws about it, but their efforts to interact with him are forced and fake, and they can’t seem to keep the irritation out of their voices. So I have given up on trying to convince them to change and now just give him extra special attention when they are around to make up for their lack of it. My in-laws are the ones who will ultimately suffer when they realize one day that they have missed out on a relationship with such a wonderful, loving little boy.